it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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