Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize