you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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