I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize