Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Randomize