i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize