I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
