If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
