Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
