yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
