I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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