No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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