I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
