I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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