you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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