ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
there is puke in my bra ... again
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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