This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
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Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
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I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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