well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
i came on her dog
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
