Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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