I want to stick my p in your. b.
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
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