White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
