He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
worst night to have a conscience
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
