i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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