before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
