Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
