he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize