I am spending my child support on dildos
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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