READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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