She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I love you. Go after that dick
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
