it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
