I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
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They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
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I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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