you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
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I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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