...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
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They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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