If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize