I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
