Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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