Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
