I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize