my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
It's just like the Real World with babies
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
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