K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize