So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
