At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Randomize
