i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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