Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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