So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
