He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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