I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
