did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
