You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
You left your phone here
Wait...
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