i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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