we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
